If you’re getting a gut feeling that is sending you messages about someone you love, and it’s persistently gnawing at you, ask yourself:
• Are there particular words or actions behind your discomfort?
• What thoughts come up in you as a response?
• In what ways does your partner either answer or evade your questions?
Also, pay attention to their voice. Notice if they are reluctant to talk. Silent pauses can be key indicators that something is going on. If you perceive that something is going on, even if you don’t know what it is––especially if you don’t know what it is––do not impulsively go at the other with full force. It is important that you make no decisions from this place.
Find a private moment and write out your observations. After, go ahead and ask your loved one to sit with you at a convenient time to gently discuss your findings. You can say things like, “I notice you are nervous every time your cell phone rings,” or, “You seem uncomfortable when we talk about the future.” See what they say, and again, notice their body language. Trust your body, it is often an alarm bell coming from your intuitive voice: It’s the closest friend you have.
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