Facing a mirror first thing in the morning may be an unpleasant experience and the most familiar face in our lives, and yet, the mirror always lies.
We think it’s ourselves we’re looking at, but it is always a reverse- image staring back out at us from the glass. We never see ourselves as others see us unless somebody takes a photograph and then the result always feels just a little bit off. “That’s not me,” we tell whoever snapped the picture. “That’s not what I look like.”
We know we’re fooling ourselves; and yet on some level, the lie feeds the fantasy we use to motivate or dissuade us. The backwardness of the image distorts not just our features, but the information in our faces and personalities as well. No wonder we suffer so much over how others see us. No wonder when self-esteem is said to be the problem afflicting our relationships we’re at a loss as to how to rescue ourselves.
“What am I projecting into the world?”
“How can I be sure of what others are seeing?”
We might consider that our intimate relationships mirror the deepest parts of ourselves. The people we love reveal the deep love we have and our desire to do all we can for them. It is why close relationships at their best can be so challenging and why some troubled lovers will flee in panic.
We often think its fear of love that makes us want to escape, and no one can ignore the “fight or flight” response that wash over us in situations of desperation. In actuality, it’s our reaction to our reflection of what we believe we deserve. It’s a reflection in a perfect but invisible mirror of our beliefs that project straight back to us.
Working on the inside is always the place you should start from first …and trust.
Photograph from Pixababy